Living With My Addiction

Living With My Addiction

Am I an addict? Research has shown that there is nothing like an “addictive personality”. People with anxious and obsessive traits find it hard to get rid off or live with their addiction while people with extrovert and histrionic traits will experiment but then stop it as well.


I do not want to give up my addiction, it is the only thing that gives me any pleasure or keeps me going? Is it? I think or like to think it does or would like to have it by doing once more and then again. Sometimes I try to minimise the problems caused by my addiction to not only me as a person, at work but also to friends and families.


I look for cues from people around me to see if it is really true?


Our brain is hard wired in that certain activities that are essential for survival such as eating, drinking, sex (procreation) and nurturing are associated with pleasure so that we keep on doing them again and again. Conversely our brain believes that any activities that give us pleasure such as some drugs (3-9 times more pleasure) and alcohol are essential for survival and should not be stopped. Therefore it is so difficult to get rid of addictions.


I make rules around my addiction about when, where, what, with whom, with what, how much and how often in a way to minimise the problems and maximise the effect I want to relish. After doing it for a while I have started thinking “Do I really want to do it?”


I many times try to postpone my urge for my addiction by promising to myself to do it later especially if there are things to do and it really works. 


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